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The Creepiest Word

October 22, 2008

Sometime back in 2006, I remember laying on my bed reading the latest issue of Fate Magazine, when I stumbled across a very peculiar advertisement.

It was from a company I’d never heard of before called Finbarr International, based out of England.

Being a copywriter and therefore in the ad business myself, I’m always up for soaking in the persuasion language from just about anywhere. In fact it’s one of the main reasons I subscribe to a lot of different publications – to keep tabs on what different businesses are doing out there.

After reading this one over a couple times, I called my then-girlfriend and read it to her over the phone, which seemed to genuinely freak her out. She said I should be spending my money on my “wonderful girlfriend” rather than on some “creepy word.” She pleaded with me not to order, suggesting superstition or possibly something satanic, but I was adamant. I had to find out what this thing really was.

Here was what the ad said:

The Lost Word of Power

SECRET OF THE AGES REVEALED

Previously hidden. Known only to adepts.

The purchaser of this monograph is cautioned not to divulge it to others. It is the one supreme Word. It is easy to pronounce. It cannot be revealed here. Within it is the heartbeat of the Cosmos.

How to use the Word is revealed in The Lost Word Of Power, a four page pamphlet by Frater E.L. Francis.

The Word is made up of only four letters and can be spoken anywhere and at any time you need it.

We first published this monograph in 1985. Readers reported “miracles.” One man wrote “The effects are beyond anything I could possibly imagine… It is worth more than all the money in the world.” Another man who had failed with visualization, rituals etc. wrote: “With The Lost Word I actually got aid when I needed it. In fact, I’m still getting it.” (photocopies of these actual testimonials available on request.)

It is the one Word the owner of Finbarr International uses when the need presents itself.

The Word brings immediate peace and enlightenment.

It is the one Word that encapsulates cosmic energy. It is the most powerful Word in the Universe and was never revealed – as best we know – before the publication of this monograph.

Use this Word to gain the strength to face any situation.

Use this Word for Divine Revelation.

The origins of the Word are lost in the mists of time.

It was the Name of Power in Ancient Egypt. It was used to speak things into existence.

Humankind merely discovered the Word. It was always there.

The Word BRINGS SAFETY FROM PHYSICAL INJURY. Speak it when you feel threatened. It awakens the protective energies of the Universe.

The Word brings a sharp, immediate increase in mystical consciousness. It awakens psychic powers. It can give you visions of the unknown. I can give you glimpses of the future. It brings healing to the body and peace to the soul.

This monograph explains the Word in four phases. You will learn all you need to know in half an hour reading this monograph. It explains the Construction Of The Word; its Ying Yang, genderless expression of the Cosmos; and the Invocation of Cosmic Energy.

Even if you don’t understand the cosmic principles involved, it doesn’t matter. What matters is speaking the Word.

Speaking the Word can bring results that some describe as “Miraculous.”

If you believe in nothing else in this world then believe in this one Word. It will perhaps do for you what nothing else can. It is the ultimate prayer. It can be spoken anywhere, anytime you need it.

Whatever you seek in life – peace, happiness, love, health, riches – just name it; and for as long as your wish does not violate the Cosmic Law, this Word will bring you nearer to its fulfillment.

THIS IS NOT A GIMMICK.

The author of this monograph is an Adept of the Secret Arts. Initiates confirm its authenticity.

Finbarr is proud to be publisher.

What wonders can it perform for you?

I could’ve written a better (more emotional, rhythmic) ad, but this one from Finbarr still really got me. Due to the low price, it was obviously a lead generation piece designed to draw as many orders out of the publication as possible so the company could add names to their house file and make their profit on the back-end follow-up sales (something Finbarr is exceptional at, by the way).

So I made out an envelope, wrote my check, and shipped it off to Folkestone, Kent England to let Finbarr know I wanted The Lost Word of Power.

A couple weeks later, I get this little brown envelope in the mail stamped from Deutsche Post.

The Lost Word of Power had arrived.

Silly as it may seem, my girlfriend’s words of warning and my friend Jason’s classic doubt (as in “uhhh, I don’t know about this, Greg”) haunted me. For a long time, I just sortof put the thing up on my shelf and never really looked at it.

And there it lay. For over a year.

Then one day as I stocked my bookshelves after moving to St. Louis in August 2007, the little brown envelope slipped out of a stack of papers, bringing me face-to-face with The Word.

By this time, I was no longer with Christine and my and Jason’s attitudes about a lot of things “spiritual” had changed so drastically… I figured “what the hell”, pulled out the little pamphlet, and sunk into my big fluffy black leather couch to read.

It begins by explaining how the Lost Word is in fact a mantra, consisting of male and female vowel sounds, and is thus the ideal expression of the dual energy called “nous”, which is apparently the force of all creation.

Then it quotes John 1:1,3 -

“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God… All things were made by Him; and without Him was not anything made that was made.”

I think this is used to at least partially explain why the ancient Egyptian priests used the Word to “speak things into existence.” …or, so they say.

It goes on to explain how the mantra represents the logos; the cosmic energy out of which all creation came. The principles concerning the dymanics of this energy “rest upon the proper use of scientifically constructed vowel sounds.”

Saying this Word is supposed to affect you physically, mentally, and spiritually. By chanting the Word, “an aura, or field of vibration, of very high refinement, is set up around the body of the chanter. This field of vibration has a particular effect on the environment. On the mystical level, the chanter has become attuned to the source of energy itself. This attunement is realized as he is made aware of an increase in the sharpness of his mystical consciousness. Lastly, on the psychological level, the mind is refreshed because of the quickening of the psychic centres.”

Ok, but… is any of this actually real?

THAT is something you’ll have to discover for yourself.

I did some research on possible alternate meanings of the Word and found something similar (but not pronounced the same) in ancient Buddhism linked to a demon who tried to tempt Buddha with visions of a bunch of beautiful women. In Buddhist cosmology, a similar word personifies unskillfulness, and the “death” of the spirtual life by making the mundane alluring, or the negative seem positive.

Weird stuff.

Anyway, the Lost Word of Power is MARA – pronounced as “Mmmaaahhh Rrrraaahhh.” (The A is like the one in “father” – unlike the Buddhist “Mara” pronounced “May-ruh”) In mantra form, it’s supposed to be chanted on the note of A natural, above middle C.

The pamphlet goes on to explain cosmic energy in more depth and provide 2 experiments you can do with the Word to feel its power. On the back page it closes with an omnious warning never to ignore any directives given to you as a result of successfully using the Word – “…this will prove most disappointing” it says.

Do I know what any of this really means? Does any of this have a basis in reality or was it just made up by some random guy a long time ago to mess with people?

There’s a reason I filed this one away in the “Strange and Unknown” section here on my site.

Either way, Finbarr International is one of the most interesting mail order companies I’ve ever seen. They’ve got some good ads too. And since then, I’ve bought a number of their little books for no other reason than just to see what this stuff was all about.

As a copywriter, you always want your ad to have a certain degree of “magic pill” feeling about it. That always sells far better than “cold hard reality” – but there’s a fine line you must walk to never go overboard with magic pill selling so that your ad draws too much attention to itself and becomes “hokey” and unbelievable, or that you’re TOO cautious and lose sales.

So it’s worth studying the works of a company like Finbarr that literally sells magic in most of their products. From what I understand, they’re the largest publisher of their kind in the world.

If you’d like to get on their fascinating mailing list, write to:

Finbarr International
5 Godwyn Road
Folkestone, Kent CT20 2QQ
England

Guaranteed to be some of the most bizarre books you’ll ever see advertised.


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